Mom Messages in May (5/2020)

May 5 ... Wendy, thanks soo much for your Derek memories! What precious memories and pictures. Maybe he shed a few tears. This should certainly inspire all of us to keep journals and photos of the interior of our various homes, etc.! After losing our baby Kellie Sue in 1979 and then baby Cory Matthew in 1980, Jeni was at the age where she loved babies. So yes, she was the first to know our good news as I wrapped up a note in a little box for one of her birthday presents. Wendy, thanks for putting all of this in our family dropbox project and sharing it so it won't be forgotten.  I remember him calling himself "gigick" and us calling him Dunk, though I am not sure where that came from. Remember how instead of sucking his thumb, he sucked his middle two fingers? I remember you telling him something like: "Yuck, if you are going to do that, at least wash your hands first!" And Wendy telling you, "Don't tell him that----it is just condoning it!" And remember how he would breath so loud, if we ever couldn't find him, we would just listen, and find him asleep down in Chris's basement bedroom. We called him "Darth Vador" because that's how he sounded. We got his tonsils out at age 5 to solve the breathing problem and bought "The Little Mermaid" movie for him to watch. Scott and Wendy got their tonsils out together and stayed one night at the hospital. Jeni and Shane got their tonsils out together and stayed one night at the hospital. Both times the younger child (abt. age 5) recovered much quicker than the older child.   I remember Donaldsons moved in about the time Derek was born, and Vivian, having no children, really "took" to Derek. I remember telling you kids, somewhat kiddingly---if Dad and I both die together in an auto accident, don't let Donaldsons adopt Derek! I had worked in the primary with Vivian and she taught the sunbeams and was sooo strict, expecting them to act like little adults! It was better that they adopted Jeni's baby kitten Bengal who kept wandering over to their house. Bengal was their "baby" for many many years! They even paid tithing for him and bought him fast food, as I remember. But........Roxy does have her own Facebook page, so maybe Vivian had more influence on Derek than we thought...................!

May 8 ...
I always worry I'll get busy and forget to write tomorrow. I forgot Merrill's birthday, even with it being on Shane's birthday:-[. So while I am remembering..........Happy Anniversary tomorrow Shane&Alicia!

Chris picked up Cayson and they came and worked for us outside yesterday and we got lots done. And nice to visit with them. Shane came also and installed some cables on our TV so we can bring up
our Sun. church lessons and other things on our devices and watch them on the big TV screen! So that was a nice Mother's Day gift. And good to visit with him too. And he could visit with Chris and Cayson. It was a beautiful day. Lovely today too, so we have been out working in the yard. I'm taking
out a lot of our plants so we won't have so much work to keep up with.

My ministering angels (V.T) showed up this morning, in their masks, and came in for a nice long visit. Kathy brought me a fancy bottle of lotion for Mother's Day and Connie brought me a lovely plate of those delicious cookies that you can order and have delivered (like Alicia did last year for Shane's birthday, when she was still in Calif. and he was staying here with his new job). Can't remember the company, but they are very delicious! I really do enjoy Kathy and Connie, who have been my VT for many years and do have good visits with them and they are so faithful. And with Connie being a physician, I had some virus questions I had wanted to ask her.

May 10 ... Happy Mother's Day to all my 6 daughters! You are all such great wives and mothers to our grandchildren! I love you all and hope you have a wonderful Day, pampered by all around you! Jen's family just dropped by for an outside visit, so that was great! Good timing too. 5 more min. and I would have been down in my pool! Brought a lovely hanging plant for my hanger thing on the back deck. They had been to Pam's grave for Mother's Day. I was wondering how I would get my hanging plants, with not going to stores this year! So that worked out great. D & D's family said they were coming to visit today, so I told them if they didn't have special meals planned, we could have a simple picnic dinner out back. So they are coming at 5 and we are having just a salads & chips and baked beans and hot rolls and strawberry shortcake meal. So that would work to do other times if your families wanted to come for a picnic visit.

May 12 ...
I needed a prescription for my glucose arm sensors from our Murray Costco, so we ventured out with our N-95 masks Shane gave us. Our car wouldn't start, it had been so long since we had used it! So we took the truck. I guess it's good Shane used the truck or maybe it wouldn't have started either!We tried to get a lot, spending over $500, so we wouldn't have to bother you kids so much.

I thought the Speedo swim suits, which are my favorite Costco kind, would be gone this late in the year. But they had lots my size and the one I had tried and liked---and they were marked down to $12! So I bought 6! I go through several a year, as chlorine is hard on them, and I swim an hour daily. And I found two pair of the Adidas shoes I had liked, and in my size, for a great price also. Less than $20--same ones on Amazon were $79!

So I just fixed Dad a nice steak dinner, with fresh mushrooms, broccoli, and baby green beans. And bought roses for me, of course!

And we got lots of fresh fruit!

We both were exhausted! With my hour swim exercise before we left, I think I will make my 10,000 steps for the first time in ages! But I am too tired to go work in the yard like I had planned. My recliner is calling me...............

But it felt good to get a big shopping trip done and have a new 3-month supply of my continuous glucose monitor sensors.

Now if we can just get the car started! I told Dad to try the little charger thing, so I hope he can figure it out!

Our new lawn mower was supposed to be delivered yesterday, but instead we got an email from Home Depot, saying deliveries were behind schedule---and didn't say when it would come. We should have just picked it up at the store a couple weeks ago!

Dad wanted Deadline Snail bait liquid from Home Depot as he ran out yesterday. More expensive from Amazon. Then I happened to check WalMart on-line, though we'd never found it in their store. They had it even cheaper ($8.41, I think), with free delivery over $35. So I ordered 5 to be delivered. Happy Birthday LaMar!

5 new virus deaths in Utah since yesterday.

May 14 ...
Just got up. Message from sprinkler guy that he will be here before 10. I probably should skip my swim--busy day--but since Dad heated the pool for me, I will do a shorter session. Need to conserve my energy. I have been trying to rip out a lot in our yard the past few days to make our yard easier in the future and get many of our plants out of the sprinkler guys way. But am limited by my back, which can't handle too much bending over, and I have been overdoing it. But it's the kind of work that Dad doesn't like to do and I have to point out each thing to do, so it is easier to do it myself:-). I had told him that Dad loved to dig, so to have Dad help.

Poor Scott is in a bad way, so pray for him. His back is hurting so bad he can hardly stand it. He can't find any position that relieves the pain, so that is hard to never get any relief. Now he can't even drive and can hardly walk. He had x-rays taken Tues., but the doctor hasn't even called him back yet, as of yesterday afternoon. It's been over a month, and is just getting worse. It's frustrating for him when he has so much to do and can't do it. I suggested a while ago that he get a priesthood blessing, but don't know if he has. No temple prayer roll to turn to.

It's been a busy couple of days, so sorry if I haven't answered emails and helped with the family computer projects. We finally took our broken lawn mower in to H.D. yesterday. Good I had a double mask on, as the cheaper one broke while we were there.

Chris and Camden and Cayson are coming to work today, so we'll all have to work around the sprinkler guy. Maybe they can help the sprinkler guy get more done today also. I don't know how long he will be here, as it is hard tiring work for him.

Our lawn is so long. Hope they can mow and trim with the guy here. Hope they can get our car started. Dad hasn't tried anything yet with it.

Kim is coming after work for a visit and a picnic dinner in the yard. She bought some groceries for us, the stuff I couldn't get at Costco.

Jen, no unfortunately they didn't have any hanging baskets at Costco. I was hoping they did also, to go with the lovely one you gave me. H.D. had them, but they I thought they were too expensive. I'll look around our garage for containers from last year, and can maybe plant some myself. I did that for many years, then just started buying them to save my energy. But what they did have-----------was beautiful wave petunias! I had forgotten that I bought some last year there. They are cheaper and larger than Quality nursery. 18 plants for $14 dollars and many more colors. So check your Costco. Quality nursery is $1.25 or $1.50 a plant and in smaller cups and only a few colors and not as bright a pink as I like. But I didn't buy more since I have a lot we haven't planted yet.

Conner's birthday was yesterday--28th. Cayson is next, then Dad, then Jaiden.

Well, I have lots to do, so better get moving. Dad is doing his 2 hours of weekly training for missionaries. They record them to view later, so I wish he would wait and do it tonight, but he loves them and won't wait.  I have book club tonight at 8 over zoom. I did finish listening to the book. True story. When air becomes Breath. You might like it. Young neurosurgeon, Derek's age, who develops pancreatic cancer.

From Derek ~  Sorry about Scott's back! I'm happy to run over and give him a blessing if he would accept it. That's too bad. Danielle got me a water-rower for my birthday (a rowing machine that uses water as the resistance so it feels similar to actual rowing, and I had the thought to suggest it to Shane and Scott as they both have similar lower back problems - and I find that it is strengthening my back quite a bit). Obviously Scott would have to recover first. I'll text him.  Is your car not starting? Do you need me to load up our mower and come do your lawn, and jump your car? Let me know how I can help!

From Chris ~ I have my charger loaded to take there today. And they have a new mower there, I’ll have camden put that together and then Cayson can do the lawn. We would have mowed last week but their neighbor was gone, the neighbor we borrow the lawnmower from. Not sure what to do to help Scott, we will pray!

May 15 ...  Scott said he said he was in so much pain last night, if it hadn't been for the physical therapy appt. (over the computer--couldn't move enough to go in person) this morning, he would have had Amy take him to the Emergency Room. He didn't want to take any opioids when the doctor had offered them, but he is hurting so bad, he called the doctor this morning to get some. Poor Guy! I had Chris and Kim drop our walker off to him last night, just in cas it could help a little. He tried it a little once, but no help. Herniated disk in his lower back, now pinching his sciatic nerve too, s pain down his leg. He's had episodes with the herniated disk from time to time over the years, but never this bad of pain. All 4 of our boys, and Jeni, and I have all had back issues. I don remember that Wendy has........   I am amazed at all the bending Dad can do in the yard without his back hurting. Lucky him!

From Jen: I remember those few times my back went out (don't know that I ever really had a diagnosis and I didn't do much but wait it out) but I know that was the most pain I'd ever been in, worse than childbirth (granted ... I had epidurals then). I'm pretty sure I'd be a pill popper even with the risks, IF it helped.

May 21 ... Sorry I'm so behind in answering emails! I wasn't on the computer last night, and then this morning I didn't have a chance to check mail before John (the sprinkler guy) arrived and Chris and Cayson. I was skipping my swim so we could all help John in the yard, with digging trenches. Big job and I wanted to be out before it got hotter. We were hoping to finish up the yard sprinkler project today, but I'm not sure if we will quite make it or not. Camden arrived at 5 to help, and came yesterday at 2:30 to help.

Chris and Cayson will be leaving in a minute. Chris was going to drop him off, but Cayson's mom is going to let him stay at Chris and Kim's until Thurs., so he is happy about that. Cayson has a lot of school assignments to do the next two days, so that is part of the reason she is letting him--so Chris will have to make it happen:-)! But that's fine with Chris and Cayson. So I've been fixing people some meals today too. And helping outside when my energy and back allowed.

Sorry to hear that Keaton has been having a strange chest pain---always scary when the pain is in the chest and certainly should be checked out, so it's good he did go in. Dad's been having some pain and wonders if he cracked a rib or something. He works so hard in the yard, that it could have happened. Scott is still really suffering. Even the stronger pain medicine hasn't helped much at all. So it is hard to know what to do next. 

I'm sure Colton and Adria and Josh will be happy to get back to their team sports. And Josh was so looking forward to earning money as a ref, right when it was all cancelled with the virus.

Merrill called today and I chatted on speaker with him and Lorrie too. Merrill said his hair is getting long and curly--didn't know he had some curl. Maybe like me and Jen and Chris, just a little curl and when mainly when it gets longer.

Hope the house works out well for Cal and Kate. I'll try to get the email out with instructions for the married grandkids to set up a trust. It would be easier if they did it before closing on the house and then the forms can easily be made up in the name of their trust. And Chris said Seth and Aspen are looking to buy a home also.

Dad said there was a snake in front of our garage yesterday. I remember when Wendy's little kids, years ago at their last house, saw a curled up rattlesnake on their front porch! And being just little, they didn't know it was dangerous! Glad they didn't get near! Once in awhile I will come across one while weeding and get a scare!!  I never picked up snakes, even when I was young---but I did catch nightcrawlers-----but I got over that stage. Also glad you are still able to do Zumba for exercise Jen. I do well on my hr. swim each day. That's great that Landon got another promotion at work!

Today would have been our dental check-up and cleaning, but I had cancelled them.

May Regarding the school pictures Jen shared. Some years when they had school pictures, they allowed parents to bring their pre-school kids and have theirs taken also. So that is why we have Jen and Derek, etc. as pre-schoolers. I especially like the photos where it kind of has 2 photos, two views, one dimmer, if you know what I mean. I used to have nightmares about going back to school, after an illness or something, and I couldn't remember which was my locker and couldn't

remember the combination............

It looks like life for you mamas is starting to get complicated and busy again, keeping up with different schedules with kids going every which way! Good luck!

On the news, it mentioned bicycles are in high demand--and bicycle repair places are doing a booming business.

2 more deaths from the virus since yesterday, 2 the day before, and 6 the day before that. Six in one day is the highest since I have been tracking. So keep being careful!

Some of you have asked for an update on Scott. He is still in a great deal of pain. Derek's family went to visit him one evening and took him G.F. cookies. The girls thought it was so much fun, Derek said they packed a little bag of Barbie dolls and want to go again to play with Taylee! Chris and Kim stopped by for a quick visit with him and Amy and took my dad's walker just in case it could help Scott walk a little and with less pain. It really helped me to hold onto something and to bend over a little (like when pushing a grocery cart). But nothing much has helped him at all, not even the stronger medicine. He has gone in to work for a few hours this week for the first time in quite awhile. He hadn't been able to drive for 12 days, but tried it this morning, just to work. He said it was a big mistake. Amy had been taking him and picking him up. He had an MRI yesterday and has a "virtual" doctor appt. about now. Poor guy! He has really been through it for weeks now. Constant pain really wears you down. We'll see what the doctor says today.

John is here working on the sprinkler system again (4th day--big job!). 

Dad is taking his 2nd nap. He tries to help where he can.

From Jen: 

So what exactly are you doing with your sprinklers? Repairs, or doing some new stuff?

Keaton is feeling better, not 100% but enough to go back to work with Cal. Nike has opened up as well, so he actually worked both jobs yesterday (and will again tonight). Electrical all day, then Nike from 5:00-9:00. Only 10 employees in the store, only 20 customers. They had a line waiting to get in, and with the 8:00 closing, then told people at 7:30 that they could stay in line but if they didn't get in before 8:00 then they just wouldn't get in. 

 Landon (being the first kid) just has the Kindergarten school picture, and Cal and Keaton (being younger) start younger in our family too! I actually do NOT like those double (ghost) shots - although I prefer when it is the head/body in the second image, not just a floating head (when they wrapped a black cloth around the body - Wendy and I both have one like that). 

Colton's games/practices are so far being held at places I don't drive to (Karl Malone Training Center in Utah County, tonight it's downtown Salt Lake) so I'm just dropping off Colton to catch a ride with a teammate. If games are too far I'm just not that interested in going either, but not even sure what the spectator situation will be (they may limit parents regardless). Basketball & other indoor activities may have more limits than outdoor sports. I guess we just wait and see.

Yes, I've heard bikes are almost impossible to find. Apparently trampolines and pools also. Anything keeping people busy and entertained at home - Nintendo Switch has been sold out everywhere as well. But TP is back on the shelves, flour too ... although yeast seems still elusive (I got some though). I still haven't seen Wipes and Disinfectant spray make a comeback, but we don't really use them much. I have a cleaning spray and cloth that works for most everything here at home - I can see wipes and spray are a better alternative in some situations. A lady in our neighborhood took to FB asking if anyone had some spray they would be willing to part with. They were moving and having movers handle things and she just wanted to hit it all afterward. I gave her one of mine that I'd found when cleaning out the cupboards. I loaned out my sewing machine for a few days too (a lady had committed to the "Project Protect" for making masks and then her machine broke). There's been a lot of "giving" in our neighborhood (FB page).

That's nice to see neighbors helping neighbors.

On the sprinklers, it started with one station on the timer not working. So Scott had his neighbor call us that had done Scott's sprinklers in his yard. Then when the guy came out, we added on other stuff and soon the entire yard! Then we found out this guy was not really doing sprinklers any more. Then I felt bad---bait and switch! I don't think he really wanted 5 days of hard work! He didn't get finished today and has to come back tomorrow for a couple hours. But it will be nice to have everything in tip-top shape!

Scott is going to have back surgery, but not for several weeks! He will get an epidural shot to help the pain until then---but he can't get the shot til Fri. of next week! So he will have to suffer for another week! I hope the minimally-invasive procedure will work for him. Maybe just knowing that relief is in sight will help him psychologically, which may help him pain-wise also. I know with me, just not knowing what to do and who to see and what is wrong, etc. adds a lot of stress. He has an extruded disk, a type of herniated disk. 9 out of 10 heal over time without surgery, but he is in the unlucky 1 out of 10 and is in too much pain to give it weeks or months. Though it will be weeks anyway!

May 23 ...

Scott called last night. Thurs. he had Amy pick him up from work, then take him to work on Fri. He then drove his car home yesterday himself that he left there on Thurs. --that is when he called me. He sounded better on the phone than he has for quite a while. He sent his films (x-ray or MRI?) to the nurse at his work. She said his back is pretty messed up.

He meets with the surgeon next Thurs. and will know more then about the surgery and scheduled date. He may have it done where he had his shoulder done--up by the U at the Research Park area (I imagine it is a place like TOSH). Or he may be able to have it at a place closer to his house. Scott researched the surgeon and seemed to feel good about him.  He is young. He is an Orthopedic surgeon, but has had a lot of neuro training also. Scott thinks he may need to have a spinal fusion, like I had, rather than the minimally-invasive surgery. He will see what the surgeon says.

My surgeon felt it was better to do a spinal fusion, because the lesser surgery weakens the back lumbar area, and he said patients are usually back in two years, needing more surgery. So even though it is a longer, more difficult surgery and recovery, he felt it was better in the long run to fuse the spine with the screws and rods, and he replaced a bulging disk in my back with a "cage." I was in the hospital 4 nights and could have stayed another if I chose to. Scott was feeling a little better yesterday at work, though he only had 2 hours sleep. He is hoping the Gabapentin will help more as it builds up in his system. It helps me sleep. Scott says he won't get the epidural shot after all, since he will be having surgery. I guess it is more for pain control for those that aren't having surgery and not good to have before surgery.

Not knowing what is wrong and indecision about what to do and who to see and how to get help is very stressful to me, and probably everyone. So I think just knowing what is wrong in his back and knowing the treatment, and that he will finally get help, is very helpful and stress-relieving, and that in itself, might help his pain level.  There's light at the end of the tunnel!

May 28 ...

Scott just called, after his virtual doctor appt. with the surgeon. The surgeon thought it was not nearly as bad as the other doctor or Scott's nurse at work. thought. That's why specialists are the way to go, in my opinion, when it is possible. Though the back doctor should be considered a specialist also. The surgeon said he could easily see the problem from the x-rays and MRI and that it was an easy fix. He said an hour with minimally invasive surgery and Scott could go home right after. So that is wonderful news, after Scott suffering so much for many weeks!

The surgeon said he wouldn't need a spinal fusion and he would get Scott's surgery done as quickly as he could, but it still might be a couple weeks out. He said there was degeneration in Scott's back, but

that normally happens to everyone after age 30. So pray that Scott's surgery can be soon, so that he can drive and live a normal life again!

From Derek: That is such good news! We're planning to stop by quickly today to Scott's and drop off a small gluten-free lasagna (Dad gets the big gluten-free lasagna for his B-day!) :) I hope he can get some relief soon! Last time we visited him, Layla made this cute card. :) I thought the likeness was striking!

From Jen: Crossing fingers he can get in quickly and that it is a quick and easy fix. I've found with broken bones (even just suspect) I prefer to go straight to an orthopedic doctor rather than an Instacare. They just aren't as trained. It's usually fine, but they just refer you to an orthopedic Dr. for followup anyway. We did have two misdiagnoses though. Cal with a knee (Instacare said he had a fractured kneecap, and as it was a weekend, had him wearing a full leg brace for a few days ... when it was just "jumper's knee" and needed rest) and Colton's wrist, they sent us home saying it wasn't broken, then when the orthopedic Dr. looked over the x-rays (they always do that) they said yes it IS, bring him back in immediately!

From Wendy: That is wonderful news! Hope he can get in quickly, we've been praying for him every day! Love Layla's picture! And spelling!

More May 28 ...

Derek's family came and brought a big G. F. lasagna (our Westra family recipe) for our dinner for Dad's birthday and visited a bit. They dropped a smaller one off to Scott first. I texted them after and said how delicious it was (I usually don't like G.F. stuff). They sent a picture of the lasagna noodle brand they used. I asked what brand of mushroom soup, and said Progresso makes a good GF cream of mushroom soup, but Scott makes his own white sauce for his lasagna and Wendy has made her own and used a purchased soup. Derek called and said, "Oh, no, we didn't even think to look at the soup label and used Campbells's. Will Dad get sick?" Derek had hurried and called Scott and told him, and got him before he had eaten any. Scott said, "Oh, and I was so looking forward to it! Dad doesn't suffer if he eats gluten, but Scott and Kellen do! I'm sure Dad's insides suffer, but Dad doesn't feel sick. They felt so bad, and I feel so bad for them when they went to all the work to make something special for Dad and Scott:-(. I guess the lasagna would be pretty easy with the GF noodles and Progresso GF Cream of Mushroom soup. I've been meaning to make some, but never get around to it---I did finally find some GF lasagna noodles and have the Progresso soup. I used to think none of the cream soups could be GF, but there are several. Some of the pouch dry soups--Bear Creek or something like that has some he likes.

Shane's family is coming tomorrow night and picking up take out from Asian Star and eating with us outside. And bringing GF cookies for Dad. I wonder if they will bring 83 cookies, like they have done for some previous birthdays.

Scott's surgery will be Monday---so glad they got him in quite soon!

From Wendy: Oh no, that is really too bad about the lasagna! I make our own white sauce (substitute for cream of mushroom soup) that we use ALL the time for things like crock-pot chicken, gravies and so forth. However, for Lasagna we ended up going with a different recipe all together because it is so easy and doesn't have any soup in it. I will have to go back and try the Westra recipe again sometime though since we haven't tried it for a long time. Ours is just basically gluten free noodles (you don't have to cook them first, they just cook in the pan), spaghetti sauce mixed with cooked hamburger (we are really partial to Prego for the sauce) and then layers of cottage cheese and and regular cheese (cheddar cheese and mozzarella cheese -- or whatever we happen to have available). Glad Scott could get in to surgery sooner

May 30 ...

Scott's surgery is scheduled for 9 a.m. Mon. So nice he doesn't have to wait two weeks!

D & D's family came on Dad's birthday and brought a delicious lasagna for our dinner and visited. They dropped one off at Scott's also. Dad got lots of calls, emails, and texts from kids and grandkids.

Last night Shane and Alicia's family picked up a take out from Asian Star and we ate in the back yard and then played Rummi Kub. It was a fun evening! They brought him 83 gluten-free cookies (a birthday tradition they started a few years ago, except for California years). 

Scott and Amy stopped by, so fun to visit with them also. Too hard for Scott to get out of the car, so we visited with him there.

Jared arrived home from his mission in Chicago on Wed. afternoon.

Amy said they will be hosting our traditional Father's Day Part----Hooray! We always love being together! But we don't want them to work too hard on the yard or anything! It always looks beautiful anyway! Especially with Scott's recovery and Amy having to do more. Their kids did a wonderful job hosting it a few years ago when Scott and Amy were in Switzerland. So maybe their kids could pretend that is the case again, and Scott and Amy could just show up as guests! June 21. Good it is a little later in the month. Let everyone help as much as possible. Jeni made blog pages with Scott's creative invitations from past years. We're anxious to see this year's invitation.